Monday, June 6, 2011

Riding in Cars with Boys - Part Thirteen

I was recently asked about the Riding in Cars with Boys posts and if they know how cute and smart they are and if they know I post these blogs.

The answer to the first question is that I think they amuse each other and respect each other's intelligence so there's always a sense that it's "game on" when they're together - particularly with their verbal sparing. I think if you asked them if they were smart, they'd tell you that they get good grades. I don't think they realize at all just how bright they are. Which is probably good for all the parents involved. ;)

The answer to the second question is much easier and quicker to answer. They don't know at all. It's for a couple reasons. One is purely the selfish reason of I didn't want them to clam up because I enjoy them so much. Even if I didn't share with you guys, I'd still be writing this stuff down, because it makes my happy. The second is because I didn't want them to play to an audience and try to top themselves constantly. I'd just like them to be them. When they graduate, I'll give them each a bound copy of the awesomeness that is them.

So this is just them. Unvarnished boyness.

There's been a lot of talk of Girl Island recently. Not-Kevin has a crush on a girl who may have the good sense to like him back. For several days in a row, he arrived at the car positively giddy.

Me: You're awfully happy today, what's up.

Not-Kevin: Ballroom dancing.

Me: Seriously? You guys have football, crew, equestrian club, water polo and ballroom dancing at this school? WTF?

Justin: Not dancing. But the rest? Yes.

Killian: This school caters to the rich and bored.

Me: Right. But back to the ballroom dancing. Please to explain.

Justin: Also the rich and bored have bad taste in music. Everyone listens to rap.

Me: You don't.

Killian: We're not rich. Or bored.

Me: Touche. But the ballroom dancing?

Not-Kevin: Okay, so everyone in this school - except us - listens to shit for music. Justin Beiber and rap are the only genres.

Justin: Which makes no sense it's all baby baby, rape, drugs, rape, bitches and hos.

Killian: No one pays attention to the lyrics.

Not-Kevin: So anyway, I was talking to this girl.

Killian and Justin: Who?

Not-Kevin: I dunno. I forget her name. And anyway, we were leaving class and she sarcastically asked me if I wanted to rap. So I said, what should we rap about - bitches and hos? And she said, how about if we rap about how much we love and respect our women?

Me: I like her. I think she's from the island.

Not-Kevin: I think so, too.

Me: So what did you rap about?

Not-Kevin: Nothing. We couldn't think of anything of that rhymed with respect, so we ballroom danced down the hall, instead.

Justin: So what's her name?

Not-Kevin: I don't remember.

Killian: You danced with her and you don't remember?

Not-Kevin: Nope.

Justin: I call shenanigans.

Killian: I call bullshit.

Justin: (stroking his non-existent beard) I can only think one reason you won't tell us. You're embarrassed about her.

Me: Or perhaps he doesn't want you to introduce yourselves to her for fear that you'll embarrass him.

Justin: Pffft. We'd never do such a thing.

Me: Riiiiiight.

Justin: Why do all the hot, nerdy girls date douchebags?

Not-Kevin: I think it's a low self-esteem thing.

Justin: Well, it sucks.

Killian: Kenzie's a hot nerdy chick.

Justin: Exactly! And she's dating a douchebag!

Me: Hey! That's my kid.

Justin: You know what? I'm gonna start interviewing hot, nerdy chicks who are dating douchebags.

Me: You could start your own blog.

Justin: Yeah! And I'll call it, "So you dated a douchbag." And Kenzie's going to be my first guest.

Killian: (laughing) Fuck you.

Justin: Fuck you first.


In case you're wondering, I'm pretty sure that's "I love you" in boy.

14 comments:

Mia Watts said...

I think you're right. :) Fuck, love, douchebag... it all gets so confusing in your teens.

Not-Kevin totally knows her name.

Jambrea said...

Oh yeah...Not-Kevin knows and that is so cool! lol

Thanks Bron. :)

Margaret Yang said...

Not-Kevin for the win!

Kimberley said...

I agree it is I love you in boy speak. Not-Kevin totally knows her name. That is too funny.

Simone Anderson said...

Have to agree - It's I love you in boy speak - man, the teen languages are interesting to learn and Not-Kevin totally knows her name. :) Go him!

Viola Estrella said...

Hi Bronwyn,
I loved reading this blog so much that I went back and read some of your others. I have four boys and I just love listening in on their conversations. They make me laugh every day.

JacquƩline Roth said...

I love these boys! I so hope my son grows up to be a bit like Not-Kevin.

Again, I hope you're collecting these. They'll make a great book one day.

Amber Skyze said...

Oh Not-Kevin definitely knows her name! :)

Chris said...

Best not to explain to them the sort of foolish female weakness for bad boys...

Anna Mayle said...

So we ballroom dance down the hall instead.

Priceless!

Brynn Paulin said...

The diecussion of music tastes reminds me of when they totally rick-rolled the school.

And for the record, you should include blog comments with your printout.

Gwendolyn Cease said...

I love these guys! I always tell people that kids are waaaaay smarter than most adults give them credit for. And my advice for parents, "If you don't want me to know every single thing that goes on in your house, do not discuss it in front of the kid." Yeah, most parents didn't listen to that so I found out everything. LOL!!!

Susilien said...

Love the boys.
Not-Kevin just doesn't want the other guys stealing his girl, he Knows her name.

barbara huffert said...

I so adore your boys. Go Not-Kevin!